I am hurting again

I didn’t know,
where my uneasiness
was coming from,

I was having sleepless nights
for two days in a row.

I was going through
overwhelming suffocation
and a feeling of being helpless
as if someone needs me
and I am not able to be there.

this anxiety
didn’t seem to go away
I was choking on tears

I let my heart out
and cried for a while
without knowing the
reason,
I embraced that pain

Later that evening
got a message from someone,
I have always felt connected to

I never met her in person
but she feels like a sister
my heart fills with joy
when I see her smile

those messages were just
some broken words
all I could figure out
that she lost someone close

how did I expect
her tears wouldn’t make me cry

if her smile could
fill my heart with joy

how did I expect her tears
wouldn’t make me cry

I could sense her pain
even over the distance

I just hope
she gets through the loss
I know it’s easier said than done

While I am writing this
I am hurting again