Unconditional love??

​

She handed over the merit list to her dad.
Evreyone was asking ,why doesn’t she seem to be the happiest  after cracking such a prestigious exam .

No one knew except herself and her father that

She fullfilled his dream and killed her own.

And then we say parents are selfless.

Are they ?? Really??

If that’s so, then why do they keep counting their sacrifices in  our bringing up .

I just don’t doubt on their love .

I also know that they can never have bad intentions for us.

Then why do they give us lives and snatch away our right to live it our own way.

Why do they keep judging us constantly on the basis of our choices.

And how come our choices decides that how much we love and value them.

Our dreams if unfortunately don’t match with what they have been planning even before we have taken birth .

Then we are useless and inobdient.
We aren’t as talented all those sharma ji’s son or daughter.

And we put their head down in society.
Like seriously???

And if you are a living being ,you might get to fall in love.

Beware ,you are going to attempt one of biggest sin if you deny the guy/girl ,your parents have choosen for you.

And worst thing  you will do is tell them that you have choosen the one you wanted to marry.

All these stuff hurt me sometimes badly because to the one we look upto.

They look upto random people and society over their own kids sometimes

I don’t know what kind of parent ,I would be.
But there are things , I will execute for sure:

  • My kids will always be allowed to question me on my desicions for them and if required can tell me to change it
  • They can get married when they would want and with whom they choose.
  • I will definitely make sure that they live their dreams instead of fullfilling mine.
  • And last but not the least ,I will never put them under pressure of “what I did for them”.
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39 Comments

  1. Well, for me it is the exact opposite. My parents are everything good. They’ve always wanted the best for me, never imposed anything on me. I on the other hand…well I have always been stubborn and rebellious. Sometimes I regret not listening to them. A mum is the best thing that could ever happen to anyone.

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  2. First of all, I would say it was quite a daring post. Secondly, I loved the picture of Sushmita Sen with that quote on it. One cannot think from the perspective of parents, until one has become one. So, I won’t say much about it.
    But I consider myself really lucky that my parents gave me the freedom of choosing the way I want to live my life, especially my dad. My mom and dad are the perfect combination of parents one can ask for. I mean, I have different genres to discuss with both of them. When it is about life and friends, my mom is there. when it is about studies, career, movies, books and songs, then dad is there. I don’t think I could ask for anything more. πŸ˜‰
    Though there still are issues which we don’t agree upon, but that is fine. There is nothing like a perfect relationship.

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    1. That’s great to know πŸ™‚
      And we all are blessed to have our parents .It’s just there are things ,we come across in life somewhere at some point .Just tried to express my feeling about certain points which I am very sure most of us faces .Thank you so much for your kind words and reading πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I could relate to this post.. I know that parents will always think of our happiness only but sometimes even I feel that this extra protective care is killing our own dreams and ambitions.. I mean what’s the point of living our life if we if are doing everything according to thier wishes.. and that β€œsacrifices” part, that just adds to the guilt. Makes us feel like we trying to live our own lives is wrong.

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  4. There is always a father along with mother . So a man who shares your views on parenting is also a pre requisite if biological parenthood is your choice.. Sushmita Sen is a single parent and also through adoption. In India single parent adoptions are not encouraged legally.
    Lots of women think like this idealistically when in college and later metamorphose in to their own mothers ! I hope you will have the courage of your convictions. πŸ™‚

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  5. Very well expressed and quite true specially with the Indian context. It is really sad to see even the educated parents wanting their children fulfill their unfulfilled dreams. It is absolutely criminal to stifle the child’s dreams and aspirations.
    I have given my kids absolute freedom to follow their heart and make their own choices!

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  6. I am totally aware of this. Similar thing did happened with me. My parents didn’t allow me to try one more time for medicine and put me in engineering…. But I don’t live there anymore. I used to be always frustrated with myself and them… I never went outside and would be lying on the floor for almost 2 years… But then I realized that someone else’s mistake should not be the reason for the failure of my life… Fortunately I found a little interest in my field and I decided to do masters in that field (which I am doing now). You can’t make your parents away from you, you just have to stand up when situation calls.. I failed to realize this when I was in junior college but by the end of my graduation, I decided that I will not allow anybody else to be a driver of my vehicle… I will maneuver wherever I want.. My next goal is to marry the person who would value our relationship and won’t keep complaining about the flaws.. The one who would respect me and would love me in real sense… Hopefully if I get that girl, I will convince my parents and I think they will understand.. Hoping for the best 😊.. Ah such a long comment…

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      1. Be strong. Express yourself to the limit you can. If they can care about their expectations, why can’t we care about our life and ambitions of our own. Stand up for your own life, cause 5 years later you will just wish that you could have spoken about this. I wish you all the good for whatever you are going to ask your parents. You can connect with me on Instagram, if you need so.

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  7. It’s heartbreaking to read, I’ve always brought up my children to have freedom of speech and to make their own choices but being there to guide them if they wanted advice. Culture and beliefs I think will change when more and more generations feel strongly that they want to make their own choices.

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  8. Some of the words hit pretty hard cause I could relate so well to them. It’s just part of our Indian mentality, one that is hard to let go! True, we basically are living the lives they want us to.. I’m not completely against it though, its but natural for them to do to us what their parents did to them and so the chain and the tradition continues! I hope that I too abide by the points that you have given at the end though! Really nice post to throw some light on the issue.

    Liked by 2 people

  9. That sounds a lot like Indian society. There are bloody wars in syria, starving kids in refugee camps worldwide and then there is that indian mentality of what the next door aunty auncle will say of their daughter gets married to someone she loves.

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    1. Exactly , one of my known had escaped an abusive marriage .
      But her parents refused to take her home because of what will the society say ,their daughter broke up marriage.
      Even if it was the only option for her ,their parents cmpltly denied to stand by her.It’s making quite furious and putting a question mark on unconditional love.

      Liked by 1 person

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